to forgive and to move on

an important lesson learned from House.
Yesterday has been a depressing day for me. My eyes are now swollen, head pounding, and my heart hurts. Now , i understand the meaning of being broken-hearted.

I made a mistake, and i learned from it. This time though, i learned it the 'hard' way. Alhamdulillah this incident has made me think through of what i expect from life.

When you want something. you pray hard for it. Nevertheless, things dont just roll onto your lap like puff!. If you dont put the effort into what you want to do or change, your prayers would still be answered, but in a whole different way. Sometimes joy, and at other times, it just hurts.

As i said, i made a mistake, and this affects my relationship with the people around me, 'habluminnanas'.
How would you feel if the people you love around you gives up on you?
I felt it, way too many times. Admittedly, im at fault in all those incident.
I had fallen too many times..and throughout those journey i learned not to trip onto the same rock again. InsyaAllah.

When you hurt someone, stop, and think back of what you have done. Pray so that you are given the strength to say 'sorry'. Saying 'sorry' straight from the heart is never an easy job for me. Which is why im writing this down, for my own future reference and as a message to all. Pray and leave everything to The One. Then, go up to that person, look at them straight in the eyes, and say those words,
'sorry'.

If you have managed to do it with an open heart, you would willingly, strongly, accept whatever it is that would come next in your relationship with that person. If it is meant to be that way, so be it. Everything happens for a reason.

For those reading, please pray that i would be able to mend my broken heart, and have strength to fix my relationship with a certain loved one of mine. She has been in my life since i was born, and i love her with all my heart.


Im sorry nek, i love you.